Funny Poems
I Hate Slugs 22/12/2014
Pulling up weeds in the border hard work
Finding the places where slugs like to lurk
All of a sudden a squelch then a squeal
When all of a sudden a big slug you feel
They seek out the places where others don’t go
Down by plant roots in the garden so low
All different sizes humungous to small
Under the copings on front garden wall
Slugs always find lettuce and other choice plants
Disliked by my wife as she raves and she rants
I had some fine lupin’s they stripped all the green
Just skeletons left of each leaf to be seen
I welcome all frogs and I welcome all toads
They like juicy slugs and our garden has loads
The blackbirds seem partial but much prefer snails
All eaten with relish whilst wagging their tails
Now inside my water butt under the lid
Another great place where I find slugs are hid
But how do they get there a mystery for sure
It feels like an illness no sign of cure
Slugs under shed base surrounding the pond
You may have now gathered I’m not very fond
Some nice garden creatures and many such bugs
But I really must say that I hate garden slugs
Our Cat
Our cat has got whiskers
With emerald green eyes
He doesn’t like cat food
But does like meat pies
He once chased a sparrow
Got stuck up a tree
It took fifteen hours
To get him down free
We found him one day
With his head in a tin
Our curious cat
On a search through our bin
He likes keeping clean
Always licking his paws
With white socks on black
Showing very sharp claws
Our cat likes the budgie
He meows with each tweet
Then he stares at the cage
But I’m sure he sees meat
He’s ever so friendly
My wife says he’s cute
But I’m not so sure
With cat hair on my suit